Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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