Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize