walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
