Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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