I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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