I am in a vortex of obligation.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
