This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
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