dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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