im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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