Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
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I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
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why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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