So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
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