And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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