Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize