If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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