Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
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