I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Randomize
