They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Randomize
