plz talk dirty to me
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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