I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
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I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
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Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.