stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
