In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
