like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Randomize
