The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize