Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
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