An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
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