He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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