Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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