why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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