Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize