Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
