i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
