at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
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i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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