The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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