Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize