worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Randomize
