He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
