You're so nebulous sometimes
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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