I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize