At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
