Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe

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(949): View more from California

It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth

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(732): View more from New Jersey

last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(704): View more from North Carolina

I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.

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(510): View more from California

well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen

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(660): View more from Missouri

Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?

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(360): View more from Washington

Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick

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