My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
she peed on how many people?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
