I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
