I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
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