so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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