Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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