That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
