the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
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