i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize