11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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