My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
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